Even when the judges come up with some nice things to say about her dancing, she can't smile. Please, let the girl go home! If you can bear — or ape — to watch the whole clip, you'll hear her, toward the end, say "I hate the jive." She means, presumably, the dance they were doing, "the jive." But wouldn't it be awesome if she were awake enough to mean all this bullshit I've been put through since as long as I can remember?
Showing posts with label monkeys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label monkeys. Show all posts
On "Dancing With the Stars," they really try to get Bristol Palin to smile...
... but even with an ape mask over her head part of the time, we see far too much of the poor girl's sad face:
Even when the judges come up with some nice things to say about her dancing, she can't smile. Please, let the girl go home! If you can bear — or ape — to watch the whole clip, you'll hear her, toward the end, say "I hate the jive." She means, presumably, the dance they were doing, "the jive." But wouldn't it be awesome if she were awake enough to mean all this bullshit I've been put through since as long as I can remember?
Even when the judges come up with some nice things to say about her dancing, she can't smile. Please, let the girl go home! If you can bear — or ape — to watch the whole clip, you'll hear her, toward the end, say "I hate the jive." She means, presumably, the dance they were doing, "the jive." But wouldn't it be awesome if she were awake enough to mean all this bullshit I've been put through since as long as I can remember?
"I'm doing fairly well for a grandmother who had a monkey tangled up in her hair last month on a ghat in Varanasi at sunset."
"Back home again now, I can report that in the midst of the zap that is India, with its heartbreaking, gorgeous, hallucinatory, dazzling, kaleidoscopic, mind-blowing grandeur and loud reality -- a place where having a monkey's hand trapped in your dreadlocks is pretty par for the course -- I came to three decisions about my own country."
I didn't know Americans were still trekking to India to learn about themselves and attain enlightenment and so forth, but let's see what 3 things Ann Lamott figured out. It's not: 1. India does not exist for the purpose of providing psychedelic experiences to Baby Boomers, 2. White ladies should not affect dreadlocks, and 3. I have had it with these motherfucking monkeys in my motherfucking hair.
It's:
1. "If the people on the streets of India can keep their humor and good nature, I can keep mine."
2. "[F]orgive John Edwards."
3. "I am going to trust this guy Obama."
I kid you not. Those are the 3 things Anne Lamott discovered in India, and I am definitely — without even going to India — keeping my sense of humor about that.
I didn't know Americans were still trekking to India to learn about themselves and attain enlightenment and so forth, but let's see what 3 things Ann Lamott figured out. It's not: 1. India does not exist for the purpose of providing psychedelic experiences to Baby Boomers, 2. White ladies should not affect dreadlocks, and 3. I have had it with these motherfucking monkeys in my motherfucking hair.
It's:
1. "If the people on the streets of India can keep their humor and good nature, I can keep mine."
2. "[F]orgive John Edwards."
3. "I am going to trust this guy Obama."
I kid you not. Those are the 3 things Anne Lamott discovered in India, and I am definitely — without even going to India — keeping my sense of humor about that.
"Zambia's president evicts 'peeing monkeys' from State House."
Front page teaser for "Zambia's peeing monkeys evicted."
There were 200 monkeys in the state house, and presumably they were peeing all the time. But one peed on the president during a news conference. That's it for the state house monkeys.
ADDED: There are not enough animals running around in American press conferences. Maybe it would help those townhalls and tea parties: more monkeys.
There were 200 monkeys in the state house, and presumably they were peeing all the time. But one peed on the president during a news conference. That's it for the state house monkeys.
ADDED: There are not enough animals running around in American press conferences. Maybe it would help those townhalls and tea parties: more monkeys.
"John Gibson Did Not Compare Eric Holder To Monkey With Bright Blue Scrotum."
Look, I know I'm getting a late start this morning. But I want you to know that I'm still here, still blogging, still ready to serve you up the tasty morsels of the day. So I thought you might like to read what Memeorandum (my favorite source of bloggables) considers the top bloggable story of today: "John Gibson Did Not Compare Eric Holder To Monkey With Bright Blue Scrotum." You figure that out, or say whatever you like about my late start, monkeys, scrota, etc.
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